Saturday, January 11, 2014

Being a Supporting Actor in God's Provision Plan

Being a Supporting Actor in God’s Provision Plan

I realized, today, that I am a supporting actor in God’s perfect provision plan (Jeremiah 29:11) – nothing more. God does not need my effort or any money it produces. A job was never designed to provide for us. God is our sole provider (Philippians 4:19). God uses a job to help us discover His true design for us, live through it joyfully, and share in His grand design for our gifted, purpose-driven life that pleases Him when we follow His direction (Proverbs 3: 4-6). When we follow our own direction, we end up on jobs and career ladders we hate asking God for provisions to climb higher into places we should never have been in the first place and gain more money/power as solace, when only God and the right work/life balance can provide with contentment.

Fortunately, His grace is sufficient (2 Corinthians 4:19), if we turn toward Him, with full faith, and follow His direction back to His perfect provision. In turning back to God, we must put our full faith in Him – forever. No matter who God uses to keep us on His path, do not put your trust or confidence in them or their abilities to support God’s plan, as a fellow supporting actors, because they WILL let you down when YOUR trust/confidence puts them in God’s place as your provider (Psalms 118:8).

Finally, God allows adversity to come our way – when things are going well or not. Adversity can be pretty tough and feel like it is game ending for us. However, a Latin phrase I saw on a rear car window sums up how God uses adversity quite nicely: “Per Ardua Ad Astra”, which means “Through Adversity to the Stars”. God uses adversity, in every part of our lives, to remind us and shape us for His gifted, purpose-driven life, whether we are cognizant of His plan or not.

I thought losing a job was the worst thing that could have happened to me. Apparently, leaving God’s path and assuming  His role as provider is actually far worse than losing a job He never wanted for me in the first place. Although He permitted me to have my prideful way, temporarily, He lovingly released me from that job, so I could fall face first into His grace and see Him as THE provider – not me. Now, I am waiting patiently on God to move according to His perfect plan, meet all my needs, and bring about my gifted, purpose-driven work/life balance He planned from birth. 

When I think about it, only God can align all of life, to put us where He wants us to be – In all seasons of life, thanking Him for His grace, sufficiency, faithfulness, trustworthiness, love, and perfectly planned provision for us that we could never achieve in the lead role of provider and find the contentment, peace, and work/life balance that comes from an all powerful God, who wants nothing but the best for us that comes from drawing close to and pleasing Him through living in His perfect plan for us. 

I hope this helps you, as much as it is helping me, because learning God is the sole provider and believing it takes a load off my mind. I’ll take the “Best Supporting Actor’s – In My Life’s Story” award because God is now the lead Actor, and wins the “Best Actor award – In My Life’s Story” – hands down and stated with my hands up!

Thursday, November 7, 2013

How to Find a Fulfilling Life Path Beyond Occasional Happiness

Happiness is the fleeting joy I experience when the unpredictable or unplanned goes my way. Then, it is gone. I’ve spent most of my life pursuing happiness, because it conveniently relieves me of the monotony of living the cold, numb reality paying bills, working on a job I hate, and not seeing a light at the end of this 30 – 40 year tunnel of doom. Yeah, happiness looks pretty good, but it is only a vacation from my real life – can’t seem to take enough of them or stop thinking about them, right?  Happiness is nothing more than a legal addiction that robs me of a consciously and continuously filling existence and gives me the painful, destructive alternative happiness hands us, when it’s not happening often enough – like too much food, drugs, alcohol, sex, thrill seeking…none of it lasts for long. So, I’ve taken a step back from the bright spark of happiness’ temporary warmth and started seeking fulfillment’s soul warming glow that is changing my tunnel of doom into a tunnel of dreams for the next 30 – 40 years.

I have begun asking myself these questions and began looking for answers at a place called The Gift Table, where fulfillment brings about sustained happiness without the drama of addiction and gives twice the high:

  • .       Do you look forward to living your life, as is, everyday or do you dream of a different life?
  •        Do you spend your days wondering or feeling like you want or should be somewhere else doing something more lucrative with a higher purpose?
  •        Do you feel like a “Calling” or “Truth” has gone unrealized or recognized in your daily life?
  •        Are these feelings creating stress in your daily life or has this new curiousness begun settling in with a sudden urge to consider a more fulfilling life path?
  •         With visceral feeling to full knowledge of a new path, does the thought of pursing this path feel like flipping over your Hallmark holiday table with your grandmother’s fine china on it?
  •        How can I change my path, meaningfully, while honoring the life I’ve built and the people I love?
  •        How can I see clearly my compelling path toward the soul warming vision of a life fulfilled for the years to come?

Think carefully about these questions. Share your thoughts with 1 or 2 confidants who truly and fully loves, supports, and stands with you in tough times – not just anyone. And, know the following about you is true:

  1.         You are special, rare, and unique in the Cosmos – so is your unique gifting
  2.         You matter and deserve a fulfilling life
  3.         You and your unique talent are expected – you can feel it, right?
  4.         You are destined to fill others up, before being filled up – guaranteed
  5.         You determine your gift’s changing path and its direction
  6.         Your greatest success, in life, will happen through your gifting
  7.         You must be prepared for adversity along the way to living along your chosen path to a more fulfilling life
  8.        You must be quiet and reflect often on your gift and its use
  9.        You must not confuse your gifts with your competencies
  10. .     You must give it away or it robs you complete fulfillment beyond financial means


We’ll talk more next time,when we continue unraveling this beautiful mystery called the Gift Table and our personal journey toward more fulfilling lives.

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

How to Find Your True Calling?


To fully understand a "True Calling", I suggest examining the sum of its parts, to gain insight into the exponential power of the whole.

 "TRUE"
Merriam Webster's online dictionary gives us these little gems about viewing ourselves and the truth about who we are and are becoming each day. Under the full definition of "True", Merriam Webster offers these definitions:

2a (3): fully realized or fulfilled true


2c  being that which is the case rather than what is manifest or assumed true
 dimension of the problem

5a that is fitted or formed or that functions accurately

Here's the Truth about "True and You":  You are fitted or formed, factually, to be fully realized or fulfilled in pursuit of life. The pursuit of life you are seeking has many names, yet one sticks for me: Your gift. You were designed with a gift and pathway ensuring your best possible life. How do you find this gift? Listen for the "Calling".


"CALLING"
Referencing a New Living Translation scripture from the Bible, it’s like this:

Mark 1:3 "He is a voice shouting in the wilderness, 'Prepare the way for the LORD's coming! Clear the road for him!" 

Your gift is buried deep inside of you. It is obscured by the wilderness of your life's experiences. It is hidden behind failures, fears, regrets, disbelief, and feelings of not deserving more or better from life. If you listen carefully and open your heart, you will eventually hear your "TRUE" calling from your wilderness. It will start out faint, as it makes its way to the edge of your internal forest of experiences. It will formulate patterns identifying what fills you up with life and what sucks you dry of life. 

The voice will grow louder, as you feed your emerging "TRUE" affirming and solidifying the clear road for you to begin envisioning, planning, and setting out for a life uniquely designed for you.  It will call from books, magazines, movies, conversations, reflections, people, places, and anywhere "TRUE" can move closer and be heard by you. Something Henry David Thoreau once said about success, that applies to finding your "TRUE":

"If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with success unexpected in common hours."

In 2005, I met my "TRUE" in a dream that birthed a book called "The Gift Table" Getting Your Giftedness in Gear. And, I have been following my "CALLING" for 8 years now. It is a journey being perfected that is perfect for me and most challenging when I attempt any departure from it. I have had my greatest joys finding and pursuing my "True Calling" and it has made me a better person for it. The journey is not easy, however, it far exceeds any existence without it because money, affection, independence, fill-in-blank, can fill this gift shaped hole in our lives. With God's help, I will continue my pursuit and it is my highest hope and prayer you find your "True Calling", too.   

Have a blessed day listening for your gift crying in the wilderness, so you too will meet with success in uncommon hours. 

If you’d like help finding your “True Calling”, just drop me an email and we’ll move forward with meeting your gift in uncommon hours, for unparalleled success in life and being a blessing to those around you.


John,


Copyrights 2013. Changing-Paths, Inc. All Rights Reserved. www.changing-paths.com 

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Self-Reflection and "The Gambler"

Hey Friends,

I've not posted anything for awhile, because I've been weighted down with so many other low value things in my life. Things I'm reflecting on, even now, and letting go for high value activities like exchanging ideas with you. My inspiration tonight comes from a song called "The Gambler" that goes like this, "You've got to:


  1. Know when to hold'em,
  2. Know when to fold'em,
  3. Know when to walk away,
  4. Know when to run."

The "knowing", in Kenny's song, transcends gambling for me and speaks to the importance of self-knowledge and me walking out life's journey. Here's where I am:

HOLD'EM: Life is called a journey, because it requires a traveler's mindset. This mindset is created over years of lugging overweight, out-sized, and paying costly stowage fees is making me a bit more discriminating about what I pack on my life's journey.So, today, I sat down with my life-luggage and realized there's some heavy stuff in there that needs unpacking, like: anger, fear, regret, pride, etc.  This self-knowledge is helping me revisit what I'm holding and whether or not it is helping or hindering my life's journey toward an abundant, fulfilling existence.

FOLD'EM:  As I unpacked my life-luggage, there's some stuff that I must let go - now. Easier said than done, I've actually got a lot of emotional, financial, or political investments in some of this heavy stuff, which I've yet reconciled fully. However, a recent reminder from a dear friend quickly urged me to just drop most of it , because it's just getting in the way of doing great things - if it's not positive, I can't use it on my journey toward my best life ever!

WALK AWAY: Like most company help-desk teams, my heavier life-luggage items will no longer be supported, because they suck up operating capacity and take up too much space.  Those heavier items will be automatically moved to the trash can in the future!

RUNNING: Now, some of the things I've unpacked and moved into the trash can may try reboot, so I've planned on replacing those items with lighter, more useful applications, like: abundant living, sharing with others, forgiveness, confidence, caring, love, and the list goes on. Finally, I will run as far away from the heavy trash items and avoid putting them into my life-luggage, in the future.

How about you? What do you see in Kenny's lyrics and how you will engage self-knowledge, while walking out your life's journey?

Love to hear from you.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

You Can Change Your Life's Path Without Costing You Your Livelihood

Another friend has been contemplating changing his path, too. He works in Academia - Administration mainly with some classroom teaching on occassion. He's a big, immediately likeable guy that exudes charisma that just makes him a pleasure to be around. His passion is clearly educating others. He gets a real kick out of others embracing their learning opportunities, before doing what they thought was impossible: Graduate from college! There is nothing more gratifying than helping others achieve their dream and live better lives. However, this idyllic job opportunity isn't meeting other core needs of his life. Now, his current job is a good job. He is appreciated for his work. He has growth potential. Ok, what is the problem here? It's a heart condition. The work-life and fulfillment levels have dropped dramatically. What's missing?:
  • More time with his wife
  • More time wiith his newborn baby (angelic little creature...and we all said, "Awww".
  • Having more control over his work and the tasks he pours his life energy into
  • Engaging more of the people and things that make his heart sing

He wants a life that gives more meaning and purpose than a paycheck and less fulfillment in his personal life. He's tired of less time doing what is best in his heart and mind. What he's looking for isn't just a job, but a pursuit that fits with his financial value, life's values, and what he values in his life. There are three things he's after and they are all non-negotiatable (for him and for you). Sometimes, we can get by without fulfillment in our work, but it's only getting by and you lose a piece of yourself in the process every day. My friend mentioned how each day was one day further away from where he wanted to be. This is common among all of us. The realization that we should be somewhere else or doing something else that is more valuable, important, clearer, Godly, etc. This nags at us all. Wondering about those three things: Key emotions, tasks, and a clear idea of what it all should look like when you do arrive at Fulfillmentville!

Part way through our chat, he states, "I hope you are writing another book." I told him, I am! There is more to life than being a dutiful breadwinner, which is where he and many others have gotten stuck in life. You can be a dutiful breadwinner doing what fills you up and everyone wins, not just your job, your family, or your bill collectors. You get to win, too. You! I shared with my friend that he's looking for a 1 - 2 degree shift from his current path: first in his mind/heart and then with his feet. I do not advocate leaving your job immediately without a parachute or plan - if you doctors tells you to do so that's another story. Here's how it works:

  1. Complete your "Filter of Life's Must Haves and Dos" - available in my workshops coming up in May 2012
  2. Research and evaluate those life pursuits (social, spiritual, career, relationship) that are valued and important
  3. Immerse yourself in activities and relationships that bring you closer to the thing you love
  4. Evaluate your financial needs and potential for any new career pursuit fitting your filter's requirements
  5. Continually refresh your mind around steps 1 - 4, while actively seeking and affirming your new direction.

I leveled with my friend. I've left many good jobs. I've continually, by God's grace and his plan for helping me share this message, have landed in increasing better situations...closer to my dream of financial independence and work-life balance (what we all want and deserve). It's time you took the plunge by learning how you can make your 1-2 degree shifts toward that amazing life supported by the thing you were born to do. Drop me an email at learnit2012@gmail.com.

Be Well - John

Monday, March 12, 2012

Peace Is An Immovable Rock (Embedded in Your Purpose)

Hey Friend,

I was pondering a tweet and this gem emerged from my thoughts: "Peace is an immovable rock. You cannot embrace it in motion. You cannot pull it along with you. You can only be present with it." This thought is rife with richness that came from a place beyond my mind's borders. When I think about the peace entering my life, much of it comes from tapping into my gifting and shifting my life's path to accommodate it. I have met and chatted with many people who are well intention about their life, and end up living in the shadow of their Greatness.

Tonight, I chatted with a friend with a great home life and a less than stellar job situation. He's a fabulous technology talent, who has been a dutiful bread winner. Well, no matter how noble our intentions, we cannot live in the shadow of Mt. Greatness without growing cold. We cannot summit on Mt. Greatness without an arduous climb through the thinner atmosphere of self-doubt, uncertainty, and desertion by those ill-equipped for your ascent toward greatness. Whether we stand by and watch ourselves die beneath the veneer of "Doing the Right Thing" versus striking out on the often times misunderstood path of your true calling, there will be a price to pay. And, only one of these prices will give you a rebate, while the other will cost you your life!

The Rebate comes from striking out toward the summit of Mt. Greatness (small steps to really big ones) will bring you closer to the divine and the divine existance you seek, on a journey of your choosing. The Veneer existance is a perceived safety net. While the bulk of your stuff is held in place, your soul slips through tiny holes in your safety net. It saves your stuff, but not you. It supports the facade of a life well lived or not, but not you. Aren't you worth more than your stuff, unsupportive relationships, and anything thing else that robs you of the light in your eyes.

Perhaps, it is time you ventured out of the shadow of your Mt. Greatness and it's perceived safety net, and explore the life you've been missing. You deserve it. Here's what you can do for the next seven days to find the peace hidden in your purpose:
  • Reflect on what fills your heart with laughter
  • Volunteer your time doing the thing you love most
  • Find, read, and write about the life you desire in your heart - you have a free pass to not worry about how, when, where, or with whom (those are merely byproducts anyway)
  • Love Someone, Hate No One
  • Forgive yourself
And, journal your thoughts after 7 days. On day 8, consider your Mt. Greatness and climb it responsibly!

God Bless,

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Sometimes, You Have to Break Up with Yourself

Hello Readers,
Neil Sedaka wrote a song called "Breaking Up is Hard to Do." He's talking about the pain he felt breaking up with the person he loves. It is equally hard breaking up with those parts of yourself that keep you down. It's really hard. It's hard realizing:
  • Life is living me instead of me living it
  • My comfort zone is a prison and I'm the jailer
  • My highest priority is not the highest priority of purpose for my life
  • I am seeking life's purpose, when it found me years ago and I denied it
  • And, the beat goes on.
Too often, we give life's circumstances carte blanche in shaping what we think, are, and do in life. Life is not our master. Life is a by-product of the choices, large and small, that we make that form the tree and fruits it bears in its season. A good life is the result of tough realizations, sound judgement, and hard work based on:
  • How deeply we invest thought - broadly and clearly into our life's choices
  • How well we researched and/or sought wisdom from trusted, learned advisors and God, to identify value gaps in our own thinking
  • How well we prepare ourself for success or recovery from failure
  • How effectively and consistently we shield our minds from negative people, thoughts, and actions
  • How consistently we act in our best interest instead of reacting to options, others, and outcomes
  • Finally, having an unwaivering willingness to change who, what, when, where, why, and how of those limiting life ways, so we can live authentically and successfully with ourselves and others

Yes, breaking up with our limiting life ways is hard to do. However, it is the only way to make room for a healthier, limitless, and authentic life. Do the hard work, plant a strong tree, and bear good fruit for yourself and others. And, don't forget about your unique gift/talent, which figures prominently in everything you do.

Live Well,

John

Monday, April 12, 2010

Want Success? Take a Tip from The Sun

If you want success in life, follow the pattern of the sun:
  1. Rise early
  2. Peak around noon
  3. At evening, settle into working quietly behind the scenes

No successful person made it out alive doing 8-5. Once you discover your gift, you will realize how the sun has been teaching about perserverance, persistance, and profit, by simply rising, peaking, and quietly working behind the scenes when most people are sleeping. The sun never rests, so like the good book says, "A little sleep, a little folding of the hands..."

Amen,

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Contentment is the Source of True Happiness

The source of happiness is contentment. Happiness, like a fog, occasionally rises from the ocean of contentment. True contentment offers lasting, more satisfying experiences of work, charity, spirituality, and clarity of action in all things.

When you experience contentment, not complacency, you will be grounded in what matters most in your life. You and your Maker are harmonizing, most days, and making life's decisions together, which lead to greater contentment. Too often, we invest heavily in OTHER people's definition or perceptions of happiness. The only one that matters is yours and those nearest/dearest to you.

Find God, His contentment, and He'll make sense of your toughest decisions, connect you with rich experiences, and prepare you for life beyond this one.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Don't Give Up

This has been an incredibly long year for many Americans. We've suffered many losses: physically, mentally, emotionally, politically, and economically. It is with difficulty that I raise my head this holiday season, and say, "Rage against the dying of the light!" As long as you have presence of mind, hope in your heart, and faith in something greater than yourself, you will survive, God willing, thrive in the sunlight of a brilliant tomorrow. Hang on one more day. Marshall your wits one more time. Get up, get up, get moving...I know you are weary, but eternal rest is not for you now. Get up, get up, get moving. Don't let this economy tell you what you can't do! Tell it, no, show it what you can do! Stand up! If it knocks you down, stand up again! This recession is not your master. It does not own you. It does not define you. Don't give it more due than it's due. You are stronger than you know now go, plan, share, build, and thrive in your thoughts and actions geared toward an industrious, beautiful life beyond recession's cold, post-capital melt-down! Go forth and give your heart, give to those in need, help the orphan and the widowed, and put a little aside for yourself and the Lord - watch your life expand, inspire others, and be everything you dreamed...if you just DON'T GIVE UP! You have to be in the game of life to win it or have a draw, which is far more admirable than giving up, so don't.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Be Positive in a Negative World

After feeling pretty pitiful about (fill-in the blank), I stopped and decided that the recession will not shape my future. The Bible says, "As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he." We must change our hearts and minds, before changing the world (Ours and the Globe). Positive thoughts will lead us to positive actions and outcomes. For this, I am thankful in the season of giving.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Don’t Get Lost in the Woods of Your Life

I am a traveler, just like you, moving through life. Many years ago, I started on a journey toward a fulfilling life. I was destined for greatness. However, I got lost. I had been lost in my personal woods for years. When I realized I was lost, I immediately began thinking about getting out the woods. One problem: I did not know which to go. The trees, plants, and rocks all looked the same. I ran around in circles for years seeing and reacting only to the distractions of being lost. I felt hopeless and fell into deep despair. I found a way out of that nightmare and you can too. Here’s a fictional tale about lessons learned, after being lost in the woods of my life.


The realization of being lost was compounded by yet another problem: Not being in the woods alone! I could hear wolves moving fluidly between the trees like water down a hill side. They were closing in on me quickly, so I had to do something. Then it hit me, “Build a secure cabin – wait them out”. I erected my cabin, bolted the door, and covered my ears. The cabin had everything I needed, but none of what I wanted in a home. Hey, I figured it would be temporary until I figured out how to get out of the woods. Months later, a town had sprung up around my cabin. I became committed to it, its causes, and lost sight of my initial goal of getting out of the woods. Over the coming months, I felt a since of security mixed with the uneasiness of fooling still being lost. I couldn't shake the feeling that something was just plain wrong.


For months, I could not stop thinking about getting out of that cabin. I could not wait to escape this town. Right on cue, I heard the wolves outside my door. I peered out my cabin's window into the darkness and was greeted by several anxious eyes looking back at me. I could see their white fangs flashing against the darkness, as I dissolved into the darkness of my cabin. Wolves! The fear of them tearing me to shreds was enough to keep me cabin bound. So, I continued dreaming about my search for a long forgotten place. The place I sought before I was lost. I dreamed about that place often. A place where life filled me up, gave me security, and I could make a difference in the lives of others. Unlike my current town, I didn’t think anyone truly needed me or would miss me if I were gone. Sure, there were those relationships embedded in patterns of my daily activities, but nothing truly meaningful. I needed to escape my nightmare and resume the search for my dream place, but how?


It hits me, “I need help getting my bearings. I need to find a woodsman!” Woodsman were few, independent people, whom the wolves tangled with and lost every time. I just need to have enough courage to watch for one passing through my town. Woodsmen only traveled by night with some uncanny sense of direction. They had a fearlessness born of courage under fire. They knew what they wanted and how to get there. One night, I unbolted my door and waited patiently for a woodsman to pass through town. While others bolted their doors, for fear of wolves, I need to do the opposite, unthinkable thing of unbolting my door. Although woodsmen were not the kindest people in the world, I had to reach out to one. What did I have to lose anyway?


I waited. First, I could see the flashing white fangs of the wolves. In the distance, I could also see the lone woodsman’s long handled axe, with a sharp blade glinting in the moonlight. The wolves moved in quickly, and a battle ensued. The sounds of door bolts being re-checked and fortified resounded across our little town. Then, like clockwork, wolves yelped loudly and painfully beneath the woodsman’s powerful axe. Every blow sent a wolf tumbling into the underbrush and the underworld. In seconds, the battle was over. The woodsmen stood quietly, as he collected himself and his thoughts.

Like many nights before, he just stood, as if waiting for something or someone. He and others never spoke. He never enters our town either. He just passes by our town nightly, occasionally eliminating a few wolves, and purposefully going on his way. Tonight, he began turning around and stopped as my door creaking open attracted his attention. He stopped moving and resumed his earlier posture of just standing there in the darkness with his glinting axe blade. His axe was a fearsome as wolves’ fangs, but I knew I needed to speak with him. So, I stepped out into the darkness. I could feel some of the town’s people’s eyes and could hear some whispering anxiously not to go into the fearful unknown. A few whispers had already written me off.


As I got closer to the woodsman, my heart and mind raced faster with each passing moment. The woodsman remained calm, said nothing, and waited patiently for me. Before I could speak, the woodsman asked me, “What can I do for you?” I remarked, “Do you know how to get out of the woods?” Woodsman chuckled to himself. I asked the woodsman, “What’s so funny?” He doesn’t say a word, but hands me his other axe and says, “Do what I do.” We began walking straight for miles on end. Occasionally wolves would pop out of nowhere and I would cringe with fear, until the woodsman said, “Do what I do.” I observed how he did not swing wildly with fear, but purposefully. He swung forcefully and true. So, I did, too. Wolves began dropping like flies. There we stood, collecting our thoughts, and surveying the wood line for more attackers. None came. Without a word, the woodsman began walking again. I followed him. Within a few hours, he pointed up a hill and said, “Beyond that hill is where you must go.” With the experience and wisdom of the woodsman, I journeyed over the hill. As I got further away from the woodsman, he yelled with an echo, “Watch for wolves, and keep going no matter what!” I continued uphill for what seemed hours. The trees, rocks, and bushes all looked alike, it was dark, and wolves, again, were flowing between the trees like water. Everything around me told me that I was lost, alone, and about to be devoured, until I looked down at my axe: Experienced, Purposeful, and True. The axe became my compass needle, which struck though wolves, brush, and anything that stood in my way.


Hours later, I crested the hill and saw the faint lights of a small town. I could hear familiar voices that I’d not heard in years. I rushed down into the town where the doors were bolted, wolf tracks riddled the town, and the flashing of familiar, hungry fangs moved through the trees. I stood there and chuckled to myself – “Experienced, purposeful, and true.” Minutes later, the yelping stopped, and a door opened. I stood quietly until I could see a person moving in the darkness. It was a woman. She approached cautiously.

She stopped about 10 feet away, and raised her candle to face height. She whispers my name with amazement, before turning to the town and shouting my name aloud. The town lit up and people poured into the streets, to welcome me. She dreamed that I would come into their lives and make a difference. As the town’s bright lights drove off the remaining wolves, I stood marveling at how different this town seemed from the last one. How easily I fell into relationships, began immediately doing what perhaps I knew in my heart to do, but could not find the strength to do on my own – find my place. The woodsman and this unique town of people became exactly what I was looking for all along. After several years, I sat on the porch with the woman who’d approached me that night. She was now my wife. She snuggled close to me and whispered my name, just as she did the night of our meeting. She whispered it with a deep sense of knowing.


Hearing her say my name transported me back to that first night we met in the dark. I reflected on never meeting her before and had a question for her. I asked her, “How did you know it was me that night?” She smiled and reached for my axe. She pointed out something on the handle that I had never noticed: her name! She etched her name carefully and distinctly into the handle. I could clearly see the name “Hope! She began telling me her story about a man she dreamnt was lost in the woods. She, too, had to gain enough courage to approach the Woodsman. She unbolted her door, overcame the whispering neighbors and peering eyes, to give the Woodsman her axe. She asked if he could find a man lost in the woods. He nodded reassuringly before leaving into the dark night. Hope waited patiently for several months, until I stumbled out of the darkness one night. Hope had made a provision for me, even when I could not see it myself. I hugged her tight, before leaving the porch for my study. I sat down and penned these lessons for other who might be lost in the woods:

1. Never settle for being lost, forget where you are going, or how it feels to fulfill your dreams
2. Wolves are always looking for the inexperienced, purposeless fool who are ill-equipped for the woods
3. Woodsmen are few. The woods have given them invaluable experience, taught them purpose, and how important it is to strike true at the heart of fear or be bound to it forever
4. If you are attentive, you will discover Hope is always looking for you. You must have courage and pursuit her through your fears and find your way through the distractions of the woods, to safety

I closed my journal, left my study, and snuggled into bed with Hope. I still have that axe. The wolves don’t come around very often and the town is alive with light, satisfaction, and anticipation of life without fear.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Managing Time and Your Gift

On "The Get It Done Guy's" website, he was asking about multi-tasking. I stopped what I was doing, read his question, and responded with the attached post:

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2006/07/060726083302.htm - Multi-tasking negatively impacts our ability to learn deeply and remember things. Additionally, multi-tasking assumes task or priority equality, which rarely exists in life or business. The classic cliff hanger "You can only save one person, who do you save from falling to their death" rarely happens in life or business. If the unlikely cliff hanger darkens your door, how much capacity will you have to respond to that scenario, when your life is fragmented by less important priorities taking valuable time and energy away from vitally important ones.

It's like a super hero stopping to chat with on lookers at an apartment fire versus saving the people IN the apartment fire. PR is important, but saving lives sits a little higher on the list. Today,our lives are ablaze with doing more and more stuff, and we're the arsonist!
We robs ourselves of capacity to actually get important stuff done and instead lament our existance or chalk it up to "It's society's fault" or anything else, as we throw one more piece of kindling on our time fire.

Time is short, as a reminder to those who forget that one day we won't have any at all. On that day, what will be said of you: This person did a lot and got things done or This person did enough, which accomplished much in and through others. Choose wisely - time is infinite, your stake in it is not. You only have so much time in this life, which is just enough to:
  • discover and use your gift
  • to positively, deeply impact others
  • to get important stuff done extremely well
  • live free of the stress an obsessed world hard wired into technology

Just Food for thought

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

The early bird doesn’t always get the worm. At least, it missed one worm I observed while working in the front yard one day. I was blowing lawn clippings into a pile, when I noticed a worm doing an amazing acrobatic dance on the hard dirt. The worm hopped, twisted, flipped, and spun itself frantically, in the summer sun. I was so impressed by the worm’s valiant efforts that I stopped my work, scooped up the worm, and buried him in some soft, muddy earth. Reflecting on the worm’s behavior, I think we can all take a lesson from the worm.

In today’s tough economic market, help is harder to come by. However, if you show effort or share information, first, those positioned best to support or gain from your effort will be inclined to lend you a helping hand. How much effort should you apply? Here’s the worm’s secret: Be generous, expect nothing in return, and be open to getting what you want in less than conventional ways. We exist in a new economy. A new economy tougher than any summer hardened dirt. However, consider the worm’s secret and how this little creature cuts through the toughest earth, daily, to discover a moisture rich world beneath hard pan. If he can do it, so can you. Thanks Mr. Worm!
Speed bumps don’t mean stop! If you’ve completed your driver’s education training, you probably know this little fact. However, this simple driving fact has huge life lessons, too. For instance, the speed bump’s key messages are:
1. “Slow down or I’ll make you wish you had!”
2. “Since you are driving slower, please take a moment to see why.”
3. “A school may be in session near you.”
4. “Increased perception may save yours’ or someone else’s life

If you are unsure of what a speed bump looks like, speed bumps look like:
· Financial crisis
· Deaths in the family
· Job losses
· Illnesses
· Lost love
· Relationship changes
· Conflict (internal/external)
· Debt

These are all familiar speed bumps along life’s roadway. These speed bumps can stop us cold in our tracks! These are big scary life events, which we must overcome or suffer the fate of living forever frozen or controlled by these life events. Stopping on a speed bump may make sense in the moment, because you want the discomfort of the bumpy ride to stop. However, it doesn’t allow you to:

1. Apply knowledge or perception gained while slowed on the road of life
2. Get out of harm’s way (traffic is still moving around you)
3. Keep moving toward your destination and life’s fulfillment
4. Find life’s nourishing experiences that will help you see and navigate future road bumps

Experience tells us to heed the speed bump sign and the physical bump’s message, or else. Let’s be wise drivers along life’s road way. When you approach your next speed bump:
· Slow down
· Reflect on your road conditions (job loss, lost love, debt, etc.)
· Be on the lookout for solutions in your problem (contacts, resources, etc.)
· Carefully ease over your bump – get help, if you need it or simply run out of fuel
· Gently accelerate towards your life’s fulfilling destination

The next time life throws you a speed bump, you’ll know its true purpose, which is to momentarily slow your travel, realize school is in session, and explore your solutions in the problem. It’s not where you’ll stop. It is generally a slow start to a new beginning.
While you are between opportunities, consider taking some time to reassess what fills up and energizes you at work. I share this thought, because it points back to your giftedness - the thing employers don't truly know how to identify, tap, and grow on the job, but desperately seek to hire. Examine your work and life experiences carefully for the magic thread of fulfillment running through out your life.

It shows up as career highlights, awards won, deep satisfaction, and being dubbed
"The Go-to" person for a specific skill or outcome. Imagine being fully focused on the highest return on your talent's investment at work and being filled up emotionally, spiritually, and physically. Having work energize and not drain you. So, take a moment and reflect on what you do that loves you back and consider building your career on that wonderful thing. It has worked wonders for me.

I wrote a book called "The Gift Table". You can read the first chapter in my press kit at http://www.thegifttable.com/. I want you to find within you the thing that gives back to you as much and much more than you give to it everyday of your life.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Recession-Proof Your Career

I think people should examine their gifts/strengths and focus their careers around them. When people engage their gifts/strengths, they get fired up and produce better results on the job. Not only do they perform better on the job, but they feel better on the job and others around them feel better, too. We must all seek to be gift/strength-centered beings that bring that extra bit of horsepower needed for spinning straw into gold – daily.

Marcus Buckingham, the "Play to Your Strengths" guy, did some phenomenal work researching the importance of leaders developing their employee's strengths to greatness. Employees work is easier to do, they get better work outcomes, and everyone wins!

Again, focusing on what you do best will give you that extra bit of differentiation without really even trying. You show up with more ideas, better focus, and truly innovative results - all because you truly wanted to be engaged with the work that is fulfilling both psychologically and physiologically. Yes, the absence of stress doing what you hate can do wonders for your health!

Added bonus, another man’s (woman’s) trash is another man’s (woman’s) treasure. Think of all the projects around the globe employees gripe about doing, examine your gifts, and match your turbo charged gift/strengths to the task and watch the sparks of unbridled gratitude and success fly!

Regardless of boom or bust times, the person showing the most engagement and results gets more of the limited recession dollars than their average to underperforming, complaining counterparts. Wanna move up - discover your gift/strengths, then integrate it into your career.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Perseverance: A Gift Table Moment

Life’s successes exist on the other side of Lake Perseverance. Lake Perseverance is filled with molasses, and must be swum under your own steam. Here, you earn every shoulder burning arm stroke toward success. It pulls every leg kick downward and strains against every leg kick upward, as you propel yourself slowly toward perseverance’s promise.

However, you cannot give up. Every stroke places you closer to your goal. Every stroke builds muscles you did not have before. Every stroke proves you can make it! When you pull yourself from the life draining molasses of Perseverance, you can flop down on the beach of success and cheer other’s arrival. Do not lament perseverance. Embrace your perseverance, because it teaches you what is critical for reaching and sustaining a successful life.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Living with a Dead End Job

In Greek Mythology, Sisyphus was a wise mortal who angered the Gods of Olympus. The angry Gods ultimately condemned Sisyphus to rolling a great rock up a steep hill. Upon reaching the hilltop, the great rock rolled back down the hill. Sisyphus did this day and night forever. Sisyphus became mythology's greatest example of futile effort. If your job makes you feel like Sisyphus, and your job/life seems like a futile, joyless effort, then it is time you unshackle yourself from that great rock. If your job has you feeling like Sisyphus, you are not alone.

Inc. Magazine published an article in 2007 called "U.S. Workers Hate their Jobs More than Ever." They cited 50% of 5000 households polled reported that they hated their jobs. When you factor in:

  • Job stress
  • Reduced hours/pay
  • Benefit cuts
  • Severance/Layoff/Termination
  • Decreased revenue/profitability
  • Increased cost cutting
  • Leadership apathy
  • Unethical business practices
  • Fewer lenders
  • Higher line of credit requirements

It's apparent why so many of us hate our jobs. However, you can't leave your job without courting disaster. With jobs in short supply, you cannot leave your dead-end job for something more engaging, when jobs are being cut locally and globally. According to the NYTimes.com (April 2009), the jobless rate topped 8.5%, which means the U.S. economy has lost 5 million jobs, to a lengthening recession. The walls get a little bit closer for you. What will you do? I have an answer: Engage your gift.

Yes, if you cannot engage your job, then engage your gift. Your gift is that special thing you do that not only improves your life, but the lives of those around you. It will grant you respite from your "Sisyphus Experience" and give you something that satisfies the soul. It will put the spring back into your step by doing something positive in a world filled with so many negatives. If you haven't found your gift (shackle key), you can visit http://www.thegifttable.com/ and learn more about your gift, which will be far more than your temporary escape from your dead-end job. It will help you live with and move beyond your dead-end job! It is the new life and career that won't leave you feeling trapped, hopelessness, and in despair at day's end.

Even though you must continue rolling Sisyphus' rock up the hill, each day, and engage your job's futility of effort, promise me that you will spend some quality time exploring:

  1. What is your gift?
  2. How can you use your gift at work or home, to give yourself greater satisfaction from life?
  3. Where could your gift take you post-recession?
  4. Can your gifts unlock greater value and opportunity in your current job?

If you need some help, I've written a book called the "Gift Table: Getting Your Giftedness in Gear" (http://www.thegifttable.com/). It has helped many and will help you, too. Finally, your dead-end job is not the end of life. It is a road sign that tells you there are other directions you must travel for fulfillment, excitement, and peace. The vehicle of choice is your gift. Get in, familiarize yourself with the controls, and take life in a new direction. A direction that will replace or help you live better with your dead-end job.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Dreams and Pragmatism Go Hand In Hand

Too often, we give up too quickly on our dreams. Too many of us give up our dreams and become pragmatist. Not that pragmatism is wrong, but should never be taken out of context. It should never be used to escape the hard work needed to breathe life into a dream or fanciful pursuit that others deem impractical, silly, or a waste of time.

Pragmatism works when you know what is important, worthwhile, and fulfilling - like your dreams. It does not work, as an escape from that which is important, worthwhile, and fulfilling (dreams). However, people do it everyday. I hear people say, "I'll become a (fill-in the blank), because it gives me (fill-in the blank). It is generally some practical pursuit based on sound reasoning, but lacks heart, vision, or passion. Unless you are filling in the blanks with something meaningful, well, life's just one big blank!

Hundreds, maybe thousands, are experiencing gaping holes in their existence. They may even gaze up at the stars and wonder, "Why am I unfulfilled." The stars remark, "Because you've left your hopes and dreams up here. Instead of living your dreams, you've abandoned them for a practical life of servitude that brings you nothing but empty promises, sleepless nights, and the list goes on. Take your pragmatism and do something worthwhile, give soundness to your dreams."

When you think about it, many of the inventions existing today, that give us joy, comfort, and fulfillment began as fanciful, silly, and risky endeavors - flight, electricity, automobiles, etc. Dreams are the essence of life. However, a dream is just a dream without a healthy does of pragmatism, which goes along way. Why don't you take your pragmatism and love it: Use it to make sense of realizing your dreams.